understand; accept: love

It has been more than a year now since the last time i wrote in here. When I think back on the situations i have been into the past year, I smile. This is not only because I got the answers and requests I have wished for, but mainly because i realized that I was given more than what I have wanted for that certain moment.

More than the immediate solutions i have prayed for, God has showered upon me great and wonderful blessings of understanding, acceptance, and love.  

Although at first it was tough, the entire circumstance has made me, i think, a person with:

A HEART THAT CAN UNDERSTAND BETTER. 

With adversities, I was able to realize that things definitely had reasons as to why they happen, but not enough for the how things happen. I have kept asking myself as to why it had to be me, or why i have to go through situations that all others don't. Well, it is just like that. Not until you fully- with all your heart-understand that people all over the world go though problems like you, you will never get away from the shadow of giving-up and losing hope. Back then, it was very easy to say something about other people's misfortune. It was even easier to let loose of accusing comments, although not directly to people. With a heart that has been tried and tested, you try to always understand. And while other people mock you for your continuous "understanding", still continue to understand.

A SPIRIT THAT IS ABLE TO ACCEPT.

Despite being very busy, i find time to watch TV. It was i think a mother's day special when a Saturday late night show featured a well-mannered woman in her late 60's. She was a mother of an abducted farmer activist five years ago. She is, until today, looking for her son. The great thing with her is the fact that she is not, at all, angry with anyone despite the fact that she knew the identity of the officer who forcibly took his son in a restaurant while eating lunch. She is not losing hope that one day, she will see her son. She said "At every turn of the uphill path of the search, something and someone would somehow turn out to be His Providence supplying what was needed for the moment. The particular grace would always be on time..." 

There, definitely, is no reason to be angry with all the problems I have. It may be true that everybody has his or her own problems, but try to listen to others, they probably are in bigger troubles that you. 

A MIND THAT IS ABLE TO REALIZE WHAT IS/ARE IMPORTANT.

I sure do have countless friends. Soooooooooooooooooooooooo many that it can probably quantify into more than 10x of the number of letter "o" above. We have shared laughters, tears, disappointments,  success and so many other things to mention. However, i understand that it is not their responsibility to understand further whatever it was that kept me in here. There were several people who knew and understood, but most of them have decided to stop comprehending. 

Painful as it may seem, I cannot force every single friend i have to actually believe in what i have been fighting for. If, someday they come across this blog and find time to read this particular part, thank you for everything. You knew how I have kept each one of you in my heart, but i am in a different situation now. I have to make choices and I am very sorry to have caused you trouble just because you think am not being true.

To those who have continued the effort of loving me despite all the problems i have packaged myself with, you know who you ALL are. I love you darlings.:)

Most importantly, i have realized that there really is no better refuge, aside from God, than Family. To my Cma, who has all the time listened to both small and big things, thank you. To my younger sister, who I don't get to see often, thank you for making me realize that i can also be strong. To my one and only brother who refuses to listen and react to every single thing, I love you dearly. Most especially, i have realized that the parents I have are the best in the world! Thank you for the unconditional love.:) 

I will never be tired of thanking the Lord for making you all a part of me.

The good and sweet Father will shower upon you things that you need. If he continues to extend the understanding, acceptance and love within you, then He probably wants you to UNDERSTAND MORE, ACCEPT MORE and LOVE MORE. 

God loves you.:)